I remember for the majority of my life mental illness being identified as something only White people dealt with, especially White Males. When we saw suicides reported on the news it was White men. It was like we felt Black people couldn’t be touched by mental illness. I guess it goes hand-in-hand with our idea that we can pray mental illness away. Even despite seeing the family members that were struggling it was attributed to demons and issues with Spirits.
Black people are brought up to be strong, to fight through absolutely anything that comes against us. What we can’t do ourselves, we pray until it disappears. I don’t think there is anything that is much more of a disservice that we could have ever done to our community.
Now, obviously there are always a few that don’t buy into the hype and recognize that they or someone they love really have a problem but what do we do with that? Definitely not go to therapy, right? Therapy in the Black community has always been such a taboo thing. That has always been a White thing too. Black families are raised to keep things in and not share information outside of the household. I believe this comes out of an honest place. During slavery Black people really had to be extremely secretive if they were going to survive. They had to hide everything, from their ability to read to marriages and pregnancies. Any slip of information could have cost entire family their lives. And with the majority of therapists and psychiatrists and other mental health professionals being White, until the recent influx of Brown therapists, that was even more of no-no. Sharing secrets of the Black family with a person who is not only a stranger but also White? What is more dangerous?
As much as I hate to see our people struggling I am so glad to see that brown people are beginning to change their ideas about mental illness and what it looks like and that we are not invincible. As a therapist myself I am loving even more all of the Black and Brown therapists that are coming in and rocking mental health and changing stigmas every day.
So how do we continue to shift this conversation? There are a few myths that we need to debunk for this movement to really move forward.
- Mental Illness does not only impact White people
As I have already mentioned this impacts us as well. And I mean every single diagnosis has the ability to impact people of color. Not just depression and anxiety that we can semi-understand. I mean schizophrenia, gender disorders, all of it. Until we take the blinders off and recognize this we CANNOT get better.
- Prayer alone does not make this disappear
Now, I will proudly say that I am a Christian. I am also a Black, Christian, therapist who struggles with mental health issues. Try that on for size! I believe in God. I believe in the power of prayer. I also believe that God has given us various avenues for getting better. This is something the people of, really all, faiths have to come to terms with. Yes, God is the ultimate but we also have to use the wisdom and resources that He has blessed us with.
- Therapy is okay
Now that we determined that sometimes we have to add a little bit to our fervent prayers it is important to know that you do not have to be ashamed about going to therapy. As a therapist of course I am going to advocate for therapy. If I did not believe in it I would not have spent all of the time and money that it took for me to get here. You know, a lot of times we will say that we can just talk to friends and family about what is going on and sometimes loved ones will give us a hard time about speaking to someone outside of them about our issues but it is not about them. You have to do whatever is going to help you to get better. Having a third party to talk to that is ultimately a “stranger” is beneficial in that they can see things objectively, meaning that they are not taking into consideration what you did last week at the dinner table. They are able to look at the situation with fresh eyes and provide you with a fresh perspective. They don’t have past conversations and experiences with you to draw from and tact onto what they think is going on. Look for a post on my blog about what to expect in therapy and how you can prep yourself.
Black people go through so many different things that pull on us and drain us and I hope that this post was able to show you that it is okay for you to get help. Getting help is a part of Bettering You. If you ever have questions about mental health, whether it is about you personally or a loved one, feel free to reach out to me at notesbykhia@gmail.com or on social media. Let’s conquer this together!
IG: notesbykhia
Bettering YOU 
You made a very valid point in the beginning of your article where you stated basically that mental health and mental illnesses had been “white washed” for a long time. It truly has been for years that we as black people have always believed we were untouchable when it came to mental illnesses. I think it stemmed back from slavery and segregation. Our ancestor more than likely believed that if we as black people could withstand being enslaved for so long and still remain strong that we could get through anything and that mental illnesses did not pertain to us. And of course the lack of knowledge played a big part as well. Most back then had no idea what exactly having good mental health even was.
I do agree with the suicide statement. Even right now, I have never ever seen a news report on any African American’s committing suicide being broadcasted as a breaking news story or a story on increasing help for mental health in the black community. Last week there was a report of a white woman jumping to her death in New York and all you seen was “there needs to b e an increase in mental health resources around our schools and jobs”. Now this week I seen a report of a black man or woman (can’t remember which gender) found “attached” (another word for hanging) to a tree from an apparent suicide in Georgia. This is the second one in a week in that same area of Georgia and you barely see any news reports on it at all. I just happened to scroll through my feed on twitter and seen one of the immediate family members of the victim speaking about it online. Never seen a news report or anything.
Check out my previous article related to yours here: https://deluxds.com/2017/08/14/is-your-faith-really-helping-your-mental-health/
Thanks so much for this, great read!
(Sorry it’s such a long comment lol)
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You are so right. And maybe the slave ideas is where that came from. All I know is we need to continue breaking that wall down.
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This hits home for me as recent as last month someone told me that they could not go to a therapist that is white. I couldn’t believe the statement as I’m sure they have no issue going to white family physician or accountant for their taxes. I hate the stigma regarding mental health especially in the black community as we have dealt with years of oppression and systemic racism that we could stand to benefit from therapy. Glad you are talking about the importance of taking care of our mental health and I hope that someone reads this and finds that it may benefit them.
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I kind of see it both ways. I personally, being a black therapist, would want to go to a black therapist. And I kind of tussle with this idea because I would be hurt for a person to not want to see me because I am black. But, I just feel like especially dealing with family issues and things like that another Black person MIGHT be able to understand in a diff way dynamics of the family. Same with me expressing struggles in the workplace…most white workers do not face the same issues that we do. So, I understand that it’s kind of conflicting but it is a valid concern. I’m just glad the person you talked to would even consider therapy at all…it’s a step in the right direction.
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